Cooking Lessons from Power-Hungry Politicians
using Uncle's Ben recipe for Power
The words that Uncle Ben said to Peter, then became the motto that a Superhero lived by. “With great power, there must also come great responsibility.”
To Uncle Ben, who we know is still with us somewhere in this multiverse, this is dedicated to you.
Before we begin, make sure you have these ingredients ready.
An expensive Campaign. Use a SuperPac brand if you can afford it. Keep a few backups in case one falters.
A truckload of Promises. You need to create a concoction of Promises with a mix of seasoned and fresh ones. This will add variety to your Power dish.
A carefully crafted (preferably organic) mix of Leadership spices. This adds all the flavor that makes your Power dish tasty. Avoid extremely bland or extra spicy flavor profiles.
Now that you are all set, it’s time to make this time-tested recipe.
First, use the best Campaign you have to pop enough Votes. This creates Popularity.
Add the concoction of Promises to your Campaign.
Now, cook at high flame until you see some Followers emerge.
Wait until your Followers start to sizzle, then turn the heat down to low flame.
Let it cook until your senses start to fill with an aroma of Success. That’s when you know your Power is forming. Your mouth will start to water, it’s natural because you are hungry for some well-deserved Power.
There is one final step left. Switch off the flame. Let it sit for a while.
Now garnish your well-cooked promised-filled Followers with the Leadership spices you had crafted and kept aside.
Your Power dish is now ready to serve.
Uncle Ben’s special note: Historically, the right way Power was served is by wrapping it with Responsibility, the great kind, which is rare to find these days. So, let’s make do with a mediocre version of Responsibility, but please do your best to serve Power sensibly.
Here are some life lessons from prominent Power cooks of recent times.
#1 When you garnish your Followers with Leadership using exotic spices, it does not last.
Some cooks want to add that extra touch when it comes to garnishing. They want their Power to taste exceptional so they add some exotic herbs.
As consumers of this Power we too long for something different. So when a Power cook inspires us to stop going to that Texas BBQ place but instead try his promising Kenyan-Hawaiian fusion joint, we are all in.
The problem with trying new things is that the newness wears off eventually.
So, when our taste palates get used to these exotic herbs like Hope and Change, it starts to taste just like any other spice. And we go back to looking for something different again. This happens time and again, and every successful Power cook knows that it is an inevitable outcome of their trade.
If you identify with this cooking style here’s the trick. Try to make a lasting impact while the magic lasts. Start a movement to make these exotic herbs more mainstream, much like turmeric lattes. So next time ask the barista if she can pump some Hope into your Americano.
#2 When you become a Power cook out of spite, you care less about the outcome and its consequences to the general public.
These cooks are not real cooks so they will use any means to get the job. In their kitchen, there will be a lot of noise, mishaps, and loud explosions. This cook will not listen to reason and will fire his staff at a moment’s notice if they go against his wishes and wants. The sous-chef is likely to quit in the first 100 days and will be replaced by someone half-as-competent. It will look more like a reality show.
The end result of the madness will be a Power dish that is unhealthy. This cook will even use his influence to arm-twist the FDA to approve it, and it will make us sick to our stomachs.
These cooks are hard to come by but when they do we recommend that you stay far far away from them unless you want to get brain-washed with lies and conspiracy theories. They will say just about anything to gain your trust.
This lesson is usually learned the hard way so we never forget it.
#2 When the Promises get concocted to a point where it strips out all the flavor.
This is your regular run-off-the-mill Power cook, your average Joe. He knows your story, you know his family. You trust him to use all the right ingredients and make the dish just the way you like it. He will even take you out shopping.
Here’s the problem. He wants to please every palate so he will pick everyone's favorite Promise and it becomes part of the concoction. He ends up with a conflict of flavors and a dish that’s complex and unpleasant.
Now you lose trust in your guy. His credibility takes a hit and his approval rating starts to fall below 40%.
These Power cooks are likely to go out of business in 4 years, and we may never hear from them again. As for us, we are back to ordering Chinese takeaway.
Post Credits
I’m not a cook by any means so I owe to my lovely wife who made sure the cooking analogies abundantly used in this post, were baked in accurately. She also replenished my writing mind with home-cooked delicacies.
This post was inspired by a recent podcast episode from the “The Daily” hosted by Michael Barbaro and Sabrina Tavernise and powered by New York Times journalism titled, “How Biden’s Approval Rating Got So Low”. It’s very insightful.
Finally, if you ever wondered when and why Uncle Ben said those famous words to Peter Parker, please read this interesting post.
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